Today is the day we've finally had enough. Enough of sharing our home with complete strangers (even though the current ones are pretty nice, we've had some horrific experiences before), not being able to feel free and relaxed at home... Enough of our landlord coming and going in our flat as he pleases, without any warning or notice. And we finally had enough when our landlord marched in our flat, told us that he's raising the rent for 200 pounds a month to upgrade the flat and then a few days later (conveniently, after we paid the raised rent) telling us to move out, so he can actually upgrade the flat.
Am I doing life wrong? Or is there something wrong with me? Why are all people around me doing so much better in life? Why do other people look so much better than me? Where do they find time and money to travel to such beautiful places? How do they afford going to all those parties and restaurants every week? How come they have it all figured out and I don't?
Happiness is kind of weird. If you asked me - "What is it that you want the most in life?" I would always reply - "To be happy." But the problem with happiness is that it always changes. The things that would have made me happy fifteen years ago, are not going to make me happy now. Having a cool tree-house in my back yard won't make me the happiest person on earth anymore. Although it would be pretty cool, I have to admit. Sometimes it's even hours or minutes that change everything. So how do you stay happy, if it keeps changing all the time?
I'm at home, sitting at my computer. I have a lot of work to do, but I can't bring myself to do any of it right now. "I'll quickly check Facebook and then I'll start", I say to myself. I know there's a good chance that won't happen, but I still believe myself every time. There're a few pictures of my friends at a party, random ads that I've already seen a million times, a funny video that I must share and.. Oh, what's that? A news article. "First Latvians are being sent home from UK". I feel my stomach turning a bit and a little lump in my throat. Thoughts start racing in my head - I am a Latvian living in UK. And even though I try to not think about it, every now and then I feel a little worried about what will happen next. I like it here. I don't want to go back. Okay. Calm down, it might not even be true. But what if it is?
Hello beautiful! Since this blog is new, I thought I would tell you a little about myself and list 10 things I like. Making lists and planning things See what I've done here? Haha. But seriously. I am the kind of person who makes a list of things that I need to make a list of. And then make the lists. Lists! Hand in hand with making lists comes planning. I don't even care if what I plan actually pans out. I often enjoy the thrill of planning, researching, thinking and making lists way more than actually doing the things I've planned.
Today I asked myself a question - "Why do I write?", and then I wrote down everything I felt. This is what I was left with. I write because I'm a private and often awkward person. I don't always feel comfortable expressing my opinions out loud. I want to work on that. I want to work on my confidence in myself, my opinions and well, everything. I write to learn to express my opinions. Sometimes it's hard finding the right words to describe something and I feel that practice would help. After all, "practice makes perfect".